Living Each Day
Keeping Up
With Your Daily Routine
Working
Thinking
About the Future
Summing
Up: Living Each Day
When
you have cancer, living each day to the fullest means:
- staying involved in
the duties and pleasures of daily life
- returning to work if
possible
- making plans for the
future
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Is living with cancer the
biggest challenge you have ever faced? For most people, it is. Dealing with
cancer and facing thoughts of death is a life-changing event for most people.
"My
cancer made me take a closer look at how I spend my days. Realizing that they
might be limited, I was determined to make them as good as possible. I vowed
to use my time in ways that were good for me or brought me pleasure."
Try to live each day as
normally as you can. Enjoy the simple things you like to do such as petting
your cat or watching a sunset. Take pleasure in big events such as a friend's
wedding or your grandson's high school graduation.
Every season brings its own joy.
--Spanish proverb |
If you feel well enough, keep
up with your daily routine. This includes going to work, spending time with
family and friends, taking part in hobbies, and even going on trips.
At the same time, give
yourself time to be with your feelings about cancer. Also, be careful about
acting cheerful when you are not. Avoiding your feelings may make you feel
worse, not better. (To learn more, go to "Sharing Your Feelings About Cancer.")
Use these questions to think
about how you want to spend your time.
- Who do I like to be with?
- Who makes me laugh?
- How do I want to spend my
time?
- What makes me feel happy?
- What types of things do I
enjoy the most?
- What types of things do I
like the least?
- Is there something I want
to do that I've never tried?
Fun
Sometimes people with cancer
try new, fun things that they have never done before. For instance, have you
always wanted to ride in a hot air balloon or go deep-sea fishing? What fun
things have you always wanted to try, but have never taken the time to do? A
young woman with cancer put it this way,
"Too
often we patients fill up our lives with meaningful activities and neglect the
frivolous outlets that keep us sane."
Try to do something just for
fun, not because you have to do it. But be careful not to tire yourself out.
Some people get depressed when they are too tired. Make sure to get enough
rest so you feel strong and can enjoy these fun activities.
The
journey is the reward.
--Tao Proverb |
Physical Activities
Many people find they have
more energy when they take part in physical activities such as swimming,
walking, yoga, and biking. They find that these types of activities help them
keep strong and make them feel good. A bit of exercise everyday:
- improves your chances of
feeling better
- keeps your muscles toned
- speeds your healing
- controls stress
- helps free your mind of
bad thoughts
Even if you have never done
physical activities before, you can start now. Choose something you think
you'd like to do, and get your doctor's okay to try it. You can do some
exercises even if you have to stay in bed.
Start slowly, doing an
activity for just 5 or 10 minutes a day. When you feel strong enough, you can
slowly increase this time to 30 minutes or more. Let your doctors and nurses
know if you have pain when you do this activity.
People with cancer often want
to get back to work. Their jobs not only give them an income but also a sense
of routine. Work helps people feel good about themselves.
Before you go back to work,
talk with your doctor as well as your boss. Make sure you are well enough to
do your job. You may need to work fewer hours or do your job in a different
way. Some people feel well enough to work while they are having chemo or
radiation treatment. Others need to wait until their treatments are over.
Talking With Your Boss and
Co-Workers
"I was
nervous about going back to work. A big issue was what to tell my supervisor
and co-workers. I knew that they would be supportive, but I was afraid that
they would think I was no longer able to do as good a job as I used to."
You might find that your boss
and co-workers treat you differently than they did before you had cancer. They
may say nothing because they don't know what to say and don't want to hurt
your feelings. Or they may not know if you want to talk about your cancer or
would rather just focus on work.
If you can, use humor or make
a joke. Humor can help break the ice and make people feel more at ease. Let
your boss and co-workers know if, and when, you want to talk about your
cancer. You may find that it is easier than you thought it would be.
Your Legal Rights
Some people with cancer face
roadblocks when they try to go back to work or get a new job. Even those who
had cancer many years ago may still have trouble. Employers may not treat them
fairly because they believe myths that aren't true. They may believe cancer
can be spread from person to person or people with cancer take too many sick
days. Some employers also think that people with cancer are poor insurance
risks.
It is against the law to
discriminate against (treat unfairly) workers who have disabilities such as
cancer. These national laws protect your rights as a worker:
- The Federal Rehabilitation
Act of 1973
- The Americans With
Disabilities Act of 1990
Most states also have laws
that protect the rights of people with cancer. You can take legal action (sue)
if you think that you are not being hired for a job because of your cancer.
Here are some ways to learn more about your legal rights:
- Talk with your social
worker and ask about laws in your state. Your social worker can also give
you the name of the state agency that protects your rights as an employee.
- Contact your state's
Department of Labor or Office of Civil Rights.
- Contact your state
Representative or Senator. You can find out who represents your district and
how to contact this person by looking on the Internet or at a library.
- Visit the Web site
for the National Cancer Institute's State Cancer Legislative Database
Program at
http://www.scld-nci.net/
You may also want to
learn about the benefits you can get as a person with cancer. One is the
Family and Medical Leave Act. This law allows most workers to take up to 12
weeks of unpaid time to deal with certain family and medical problems. To
learn more, speak with the Human Resource office where you work. You can also
contact the U.S. Department of Labor at (202) 693-0066 or http://www.dol.gov/.
Some people can't return to
their jobs because of their cancer. For instance, you may no longer be able to
lift heavy boxes if that task is a part of your job. If you can't do the work
you did before, contact your state Rehabilitation Program. Ask about training
programs that teach you the skills you need for other kinds of work. To learn
more, look under the state government section in the blue pages of your phone
book.
You may find it helpful to
look beyond your treatment and think about what you want to do when you feel
well again. Many people find it helpful to set goals. Setting goals gives them
something to think about and work toward. Goals can also help people focus on
what they want to achieve next week, next year, and into the future. As one
man with cancer said,
"I
decided I would travel to Europe when my therapy was over. I used treatment
time to research the countries I wanted to visit and read first-person
accounts written by other travelers. I bought a new camera and figured out how
to use it. I even brushed up on my French!"
Goals can also help you get
you through hard times. In fact, many cancer patients have done much better
than their doctor expected because they wanted to go to a wedding or meet
their new grandchild.
It is wise for people with
cancer to "put their house in order." Think about making a will and talk about
end-of-life choices with your loved ones. You may also want to put your photos
into albums, write down your family history, and sort through some of the
things you own.
Putting your house in order
is not the same as giving up. In fact, it is a way that people with cancer can
live each day to the fullest and think about the future. These things make
sense for everyone, sick or well.
If
you wait for tomorrow, tomorrow comes. If you don't wait for tomorrow,
tomorrow comes.
--Senegalese Proverb |
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Advance Directives
Advance directives are legal
papers that allow you to decide ahead of time how you want to be treated
when you are dying. They help your loved ones and doctors know what to do
if, and when, you can't tell them yourself.
People with cancer face a
lot of choices about the future. It's hard to talk about the end of your
life. But when you do, you can have peace of mind. You will know you cared
enough to make hard choices for yourself, instead of leaving them for your
loved ones and health care providers.
Advance directives
include:
- A will to
divide your money and things you own among your heirs
- A living will
to let people know what kind of medical care you want if you are close
to death
- A durable power of
attorney to appoint a person (a "health care proxy") to make medical
decisions for you when you can't make them yourself
- A trust to give
your money or things you own to someone else
For more
information, contact the Cancer Information Service at 1-800-4-CANCER
(1-800-422-6237), by TTY (for deaf and hard of hearing callers) at
1-800-332-8615, or through the Internet at
http://www.cancer.gov. Click on the "Need
Help?" button to send a message. |
Once you finish
treatment, you may expect life to return to the way it was before cancer. In
truth, it can take a while for life to settle down. This can be a hard time.
While you adjust to life after treatment, you may find it helpful to read Facing Forward: Life After Cancer Treatment.
| Living
with cancer means not only looking at death but also how to live the rest
of your life--whether it is long or short. Take care of daily duties and
do things that are fun. Both are needed for a full life.
Many people who have
cancer feel that living each day to the fullest means:
- staying involved in
the duties and pleasures of daily life
- returning to work if
possible
- making plans for the
future
|
